Recently Shahid Kapoor Share your thoughts Especially on the importance of insecurity in men in the context of Indian society.
Appearing on Faye D’Souza’s podcast, he pointed out that from a young age, Indian men are often taught to uphold traditional roles as providers and protectors, which can put a lot of pressure on them. “Sometimes you just want to relax and be like, okay man I don’t have to worry about all the time and everybody…and I can be vulnerable and let somebody else protect me, you know? Why can’t we just reverse the roles sometimes?”
He continues, “It’s fair to feel this way because ultimately everyone is human. Discussing how men find it difficult to reveal their vulnerable side, the Kabir Singh The actor said, “I think because I’m an actor, maybe I’m comfortable with it because it’s part of what I do. When you’re an actor, you understand that too. The risk is very attractive. You understand that aggression cannot attract people as a risk.”
While the risk is increasingly discussed in progressive circles, it still faces resistance, especially in communities that place a high value on traditional masculine norms. The stigma associated with vulnerability in men can create challenges for those who want to express their feelings more freely.
How do traditional masculine norms in cultures like India shape the way men perceive vulnerability and emotional expression?
Dr Arohi Vardhan, Consultant Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist, Post Doctoral Fellowship in Psychiatry at Kadabams MindTalk, tells indianexpress.com, “In cultures like India, traditional masculine norms have long dictated how men are expected to behave, often privileging traits like strength, stoic. and the role of the provider. These societal expectations shape men’s perceptions of weakness, often equating it with weakness.
From an early age, Indian boys are often taught to ‘man up’ and suppress emotions. Dr. Vardhan says that sadness, fear, or even expression affection Traits like rigidity and flexibility are discouraged. “The emphasis on being the family’s breadwinner and breadwinner leads to feelings of emotional isolation. Weakness is perceived as a liability that can compromise their ability to fulfill these roles.”
Emotional expression, especially crying or expressing insecurity, is often labeled as ‘feminine’, reinforcing the idea that men must suppress such behaviours. Communities tend to reward men for their stoicism, while ridiculing or marginalizing those who demonstrate emotional openness, perpetuating the cycle of emotional repression.
While modern discourse praises risk to foster deep connection and authenticity, traditional narratives still dominate workplace dynamics, relationships and media portrayals, where stoicism and tenacity are rewarded.
Why is there so often a stigma attached to weakness in men, even though it is celebrated as a positive trait in theory?
Dr. Vardhan explains, “Men are often perceived as weak or inadequate by friends, family or romantic partners. This judgment stems from social norms. Equivalent masculinity with dominance and invulnerability.”
While modern discourse praises risk to foster deep connection and authenticity, traditional narratives still dominate workplace dynamics, relationships and media portrayals, where stoicism and tenacity are rewarded, Dr Vardhan highlights.
The concept of ‘toxic masculinity’ perpetuates the notion that emotional expression undermines a man’s ability to lead or protect. This creates internal pressure to conform to old standards. “Although public figures like Shahid Kapoor celebrate vulnerability, such portrayals are relatively new. The lack of consistent male role models who openly embrace emotional expression contributes to the stigma,” Dr. Vardhan commented.
How can men navigate social pressures by embracing emotional openness and vulnerability?
Dr. Vardhan notes that embracing vulnerability in the midst of social pressures involves recognizing it as a strength, building emotional awareness through practices such as mindfulness, and finding safe spaces for expression. Redefining masculinity to include empathy and emotional intelligence Normalizing the mental health conversation And therapy helps men balance hope and well-being, promoting healthy relationships and personal growth.